Tuesday, May 6, 2008

I have 5 can openers?!?!?!?!?!

Whatever government agency is incharge of resource allocation is not doing their job. Let me show you what I mean with some before and after pictures.

before


after



before




after


before


after



Today I attacked the kitchen. In my efforts to organize the mess I found that I had 5 can openers. One old fashion. (Have to keep that because my great grandfather invented it.) One electric. One in my camping stuff and two manual can openers in the house. I ask why do I have or need 5. Two maybe. I can even rationalize 3 but 5!!! I have found that I have enough plastic silverware to last for at least three meals a day for a month or more. I have more stupid cups than I can count. I even have a wine bottle opener thing. I am Mormon. Never had wine don't plan on having wine. Is there some other use for this tool? Can it be used to make a craft or possibly in gardening? If there is I don't it. So why do I have it? Tupperware, Rubbermaid? Oh I have plenty of that too. Now I don't know that I have lids to go with the containers or vise versa, but I have plenty. Frying pans =8. I have two that are exactly alike even. I only have four burners on my stove. I can't even use them all at the same time. I suppose I could have some kind of omlet party and just go wild. But lets face it, I would burn more than I would serve.

On the other hand I have only one small cutting board. So my guess is somewhere someone has 10 different sized cutting boards and the government has not auditted their posessions yet either. Maybe I should send some of my things to a developing country. Maybe they could use one of my cake servers. Do they have much cake in developing countries? Honestly I just use a knife, fork, spatula, or my fingers.

Tomorrow, I move onto the bedrooms. Again, I wear basically the same things over and over again, but I have enough clothes to go months and never wear the same outfit. I understand that a formal dress doesn't work at Chili's but you get the idea. Plus there are the clothes that I really intend to get back into. Today, I put one of those on and let's just say sausages have nothing on me. But don't worry. I will be a size two by the end of the year. Which will then mean I have to save all of these clothes for when I gain the weight back or to show on the weightloss commercials. I mean how many times has that Jared guy from Subway shown his old jeans. So I will have clothes from size two on up right? I should just try and get to a 12 and save some closet space.

Well, I should head to bed. I will talk to Matt in the morning about what government agency is in charge of auditting my possessions. I am thinking it is the IRS. In which case, he should have some pull.

Andrea

2 comments:

Beth Soelberg said...

That's funny...I should have consulted you on the can opener thing. I just bought a new one b/c my old one was giving out too often and I was using a fork to pry the tops off of my canned goods.

Good luck moving into the remaining rooms of your house!

rachel said...

Ok, the sausage thing seriously made me laugh out loud. I'm shooting for a size 2, also (guffaw!), so we'll see how that goes.

We have 4 can openers, two of which don't work. Don't know why they're still in the drawer, but do you think I threw them away when I just counted? Still there!

I don't envy your unpacking. I hate that part of moving worst of all. But I'm so glad you have a blog so I can see what you are up to!