Okay, I am just sitting here and watching Women Behind Bars on WE. I don't know why I like to watch these crazy shows. I like to watch court tv too. Anyway, I was watching this stupid show and now I am infuriated. This women shot her two 4 or 5 year old twin boys while they watched TV. She claims Paxil and Zoloft made her do it. You have got to be kidding me! I don't work for any drug company or claim to have any sort of medical degree. I know that these meds can at times cause homicidal or suicidal thoughts. She claims that she was changed from one to the other and that caused her to go crazy. She claims that her nurse practitioner did not ween her from one to the other and did not listen to her when she said she was feeling suicidal.
Here is the part that really upsets me. Her blood alcohol was 3-4 times the legal limit. She was also taking Xanax which is an antianxiety medication with a sedative effect which would be magnified by the alcohol. I think that people who are that drunk do things they don't remember and maybe are out of character for them without any other factors at all. I am sure she didn't say to her NP that she was also downing her meds with alcohol or that she thought that her antidepressant was causing her to increase her drinking.
Her family actual said in the piece on her that she was a victim of the drug companies. No way!!! She was not taking the meds as directed. She probably wasn't an hundred percent truthful with her medical care provider. She knew herself well enough to go the NP to ask to have her meds changed but not to say "I am feeling like I am in a bad place. I had better get out of here." Nope she decided to drink it away or something.
Thankfully, she was found guilty and will now serve consecutive sentences for the murders which should keep her in prison for life. I am glad she will have plenty of time think about what she has done.
Here is a link if you want to know a little more or see air dates for this show. http://www.wetv.com/women-behind-bars/episodes/farchild-demeniuk
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
Could I be adjusting?
So I thought I should give a bit of an update today. I am not feeling so great to my stomach. So I am doing the B.R.AT. diet. Which means I need to do something to break up the blandness of my meal. What is better than blogging to make life exciting?
On Monday, I went to a Mother's group that I found on the internet. I guess there are these Meetup groups for all sorts of things. Anyway, it was at the Zoo. The Zoo isn't very big. It took us about an hour to go through the zoo. There were four moms total and five kids. It was okay, but I didn't feel an instant connection and Aidan didn't really get to play with the other kids. Unfortunately, the bears weren't out and neither were the monkeys. I think we will try it out again and see if it goes any better. I would like to go to things that don't cost anything and that the kids can just hang out together. I will suggest that.
I am getting to know my way around. I think I could make it to church on my own and I found Matt's office from the Zoo and I found the zoo with just Matt's instructions. I think I could even tell someone how to find my house. I found to farmer's market Saturday which turned out to be more of a craft market. But I heard that today there is a midweek farmer's market starting so I am going to try to find that. There is also some sort of thing going on today to find a homeless animals homes. It is sponsored by Hills as part of their find a million pets a home campaign. I think I will take Aidan since he just loves animals so much. Don't worry I will be strong and resist the cute little faces. I am pretty sure I can't handle any more responsiblity right now. Especially one with fur.
Okay my stomach is feeling well enough to head on out I think. Wish us luck.
On Monday, I went to a Mother's group that I found on the internet. I guess there are these Meetup groups for all sorts of things. Anyway, it was at the Zoo. The Zoo isn't very big. It took us about an hour to go through the zoo. There were four moms total and five kids. It was okay, but I didn't feel an instant connection and Aidan didn't really get to play with the other kids. Unfortunately, the bears weren't out and neither were the monkeys. I think we will try it out again and see if it goes any better. I would like to go to things that don't cost anything and that the kids can just hang out together. I will suggest that.
I am getting to know my way around. I think I could make it to church on my own and I found Matt's office from the Zoo and I found the zoo with just Matt's instructions. I think I could even tell someone how to find my house. I found to farmer's market Saturday which turned out to be more of a craft market. But I heard that today there is a midweek farmer's market starting so I am going to try to find that. There is also some sort of thing going on today to find a homeless animals homes. It is sponsored by Hills as part of their find a million pets a home campaign. I think I will take Aidan since he just loves animals so much. Don't worry I will be strong and resist the cute little faces. I am pretty sure I can't handle any more responsiblity right now. Especially one with fur.
Okay my stomach is feeling well enough to head on out I think. Wish us luck.
Friday, May 16, 2008
Children's literature
Oh yeah, that sounds way deep. Like I am going to do some sort of book review. But no that is not it at all. Now that I have time to devote to momming, I have started to actually do a bedtime routine with Aidan. I will admit that it used to be "come on and get in bed with mom" then set the sleep timer on the TV, tune into Disney channel or some DVD he liked and then I would fall asleep and hope he did too. I know that would be my proudest mom moment there for sure.
Anyway, since we are doing this bedtime thing again, I read several books to Aidan each night. He has Cars memorized so I decided to cut way back on that one and hide it if necessary. His other favorites are Incredibles, Meet the Robinson's, Ratatouille and Pooh. (Disney book club produces books to go with every movie and character they have I think. My favorite are his Pooh ones.
Pooh is full of wisdom. I know he is referred to as the bear of little brains and maybe it isn't Pooh who has the wisdom. It is his friends that help him gain the wisdom. I have a couple of favorite passages. The first is from Pooh and the Honey Tree. Pooh is stuck in Rabbits door after scarfing down way too much honey for lunch. Upon realizing he is stuck Pooh says "It all comes from liking honey too much." Rabbit replies, "It all comes from eating honey too much." What dieter can't learn from that. I suppose I can love chocolate all I want but it is the eating of the chocolate that cause problems.
Another favorite Pooh of mine is Pooh's Grand Adventure. In it Christopher Robin is getting ready to go off to school. He is spending his last perfect day of summer with the bear. Pooh begins by saying, "This is my favorite part of the day. When you and me become we." That is the definition of a friend. I remember back in the day especially spending hours upon hours every summer day with friends and how I just wasn't having a good time until I was with them. I feel that way about Aidan sort of too. My favorite part of the day is when he wakes up and comes to find me.
In the same story, Christopher Robin gives Pooh some comforting words at the end of their last perfect day of summer. He says, "You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. But the most important thing, even if we're apart, I will always be with you." The first 80 times I read that I cried. It reminds me of when my mom left me at college and the advice she gave me. I will not tell you right now about the "invisible cape" she made me, but ask me some other time and I will. It also makes me wonder if Heavenly Father said something like that to me before sending me to earth. Sometimes it takes someone outside of you to tell you you can do it. Someone who knows your strengths and can say to you when you are doubting " you can do it". Maybe that is another definition of a friend. I think just hearing another person say that to you can give you the courage you need to take the next step.
So I love to read to Aidan. Because as I read the same words on the pages over and over again I have the opportunity to learn something. Even Cars has a message about finding out who you really are and how sometimes others help us become a better person. Next time you pick up a book to read to one of the kids and think "I have this thing memorized. I can probably read it and do my nails at the same time." Stop and see if there is something in it for you too.
To all of my friends I say "you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if we're apart, I will always be with you"
Anyway, since we are doing this bedtime thing again, I read several books to Aidan each night. He has Cars memorized so I decided to cut way back on that one and hide it if necessary. His other favorites are Incredibles, Meet the Robinson's, Ratatouille and Pooh. (Disney book club produces books to go with every movie and character they have I think. My favorite are his Pooh ones.
Pooh is full of wisdom. I know he is referred to as the bear of little brains and maybe it isn't Pooh who has the wisdom. It is his friends that help him gain the wisdom. I have a couple of favorite passages. The first is from Pooh and the Honey Tree. Pooh is stuck in Rabbits door after scarfing down way too much honey for lunch. Upon realizing he is stuck Pooh says "It all comes from liking honey too much." Rabbit replies, "It all comes from eating honey too much." What dieter can't learn from that. I suppose I can love chocolate all I want but it is the eating of the chocolate that cause problems.
Another favorite Pooh of mine is Pooh's Grand Adventure. In it Christopher Robin is getting ready to go off to school. He is spending his last perfect day of summer with the bear. Pooh begins by saying, "This is my favorite part of the day. When you and me become we." That is the definition of a friend. I remember back in the day especially spending hours upon hours every summer day with friends and how I just wasn't having a good time until I was with them. I feel that way about Aidan sort of too. My favorite part of the day is when he wakes up and comes to find me.
In the same story, Christopher Robin gives Pooh some comforting words at the end of their last perfect day of summer. He says, "You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. But the most important thing, even if we're apart, I will always be with you." The first 80 times I read that I cried. It reminds me of when my mom left me at college and the advice she gave me. I will not tell you right now about the "invisible cape" she made me, but ask me some other time and I will. It also makes me wonder if Heavenly Father said something like that to me before sending me to earth. Sometimes it takes someone outside of you to tell you you can do it. Someone who knows your strengths and can say to you when you are doubting " you can do it". Maybe that is another definition of a friend. I think just hearing another person say that to you can give you the courage you need to take the next step.
So I love to read to Aidan. Because as I read the same words on the pages over and over again I have the opportunity to learn something. Even Cars has a message about finding out who you really are and how sometimes others help us become a better person. Next time you pick up a book to read to one of the kids and think "I have this thing memorized. I can probably read it and do my nails at the same time." Stop and see if there is something in it for you too.
To all of my friends I say "you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if we're apart, I will always be with you"
Sunday, May 11, 2008
A Tribute to My Mom
I have been trying to think of what to get my mom for Mother's Day. I thought about a card, but what card could say the things I wanted say to my mom. Although she found a great card for me. I have a hard time getting a really meaningful card since I tend to go the humor route. So, here are some reason I love and admire my mom and am most grateful that she is my mom.
1. She is awesome at just about everything. She gives me huge shoes to follow in. She pretends like she isn't good at everything, but I tell you she is. For example, she pretends like she doesn't know how to cook, but when I call and ask her how to make something she always knows how. She taught me to add the flour before the gravy starts to boil to avoid lumps. If she had to she could make fudge too.
2. She used to correct all of my english papers. She knows a lot of big words and isn't afraid to use them and has given me a great vocabulary. She always gave me definations when I would ask. Never told me to go look it up.
3. She has great taste. She decorates her home beautifully. She dresses awesome. She has a good eye for art as well. She keeps a beautiful garden. She knows that you can wear orange and green together.
4. She decorates for every holiday. Big holidays. Little holidays. She even buys candy to match the holidays. I especially love Christmas at her house. She has so many beautiful ornaments. Walking into her house at Christmas is like walking into a winter wonderland.
5. She put up with fights weekly because I hated to practice my violin. By fights I don't mean nagging. I mean knock out, drag down fights. While the violin and I don't get along, I am glad she exposed me to it and I am thankful that she encouraged me to play the piano. I enjoy being able to play for myself, my family and occassionaly others.
6. I am glad she took me on vacation and introduced to different parts of the country. On this trip to Kansas I was reminded about our family vacations that we took when I was a kid. I don't know what sort of crazy people my parents were to drive for two or three days with two girls who fought non stop in a car with no DVD player (I don't even remember tapes or them allowing us to listen to the radio). But they did it. We went west and south and north and east.
7. She used to let my friends spend the night. Now she would usually get up at some point and come into my room and remind us that it was late and she couldn't sleep because we were too loud, but she let me keep having friends over. And she was a good influence on us too. Giving us life lessons when she had the opportunity.
8. She is very strong. Now I am not talking about physically. Not that with a little adrenaline she couldn't lift a car, but I mean emotionally. She is not shaken easily. She doesn't cry at the drop of a hat. When I am overwhelmed I call her and she gives me an action plan. She takes my bunch of tearful emotions and organizes them into something productive.
9. She is a great grandmother. When we found out Aidan was a boy she said " I don't know what to do with a boy". She could have fooled me. Aidan loves her so much. He just about blows up with excitement when he looks through the window on her front door and sees her coming.
10. She is MY mom. I love her most because she is MINE. I am very blessed to have this great example of a women as my mom. She has given me so many wonderful qualities. Especially the gospel. Only one other person in the whole world is as blessed as I am in this regard and I think she would agree with me one hundred percent that she is the best mom a girl could have.
I LOVE YOU MOM.
1. She is awesome at just about everything. She gives me huge shoes to follow in. She pretends like she isn't good at everything, but I tell you she is. For example, she pretends like she doesn't know how to cook, but when I call and ask her how to make something she always knows how. She taught me to add the flour before the gravy starts to boil to avoid lumps. If she had to she could make fudge too.
2. She used to correct all of my english papers. She knows a lot of big words and isn't afraid to use them and has given me a great vocabulary. She always gave me definations when I would ask. Never told me to go look it up.
3. She has great taste. She decorates her home beautifully. She dresses awesome. She has a good eye for art as well. She keeps a beautiful garden. She knows that you can wear orange and green together.
4. She decorates for every holiday. Big holidays. Little holidays. She even buys candy to match the holidays. I especially love Christmas at her house. She has so many beautiful ornaments. Walking into her house at Christmas is like walking into a winter wonderland.
5. She put up with fights weekly because I hated to practice my violin. By fights I don't mean nagging. I mean knock out, drag down fights. While the violin and I don't get along, I am glad she exposed me to it and I am thankful that she encouraged me to play the piano. I enjoy being able to play for myself, my family and occassionaly others.
6. I am glad she took me on vacation and introduced to different parts of the country. On this trip to Kansas I was reminded about our family vacations that we took when I was a kid. I don't know what sort of crazy people my parents were to drive for two or three days with two girls who fought non stop in a car with no DVD player (I don't even remember tapes or them allowing us to listen to the radio). But they did it. We went west and south and north and east.
7. She used to let my friends spend the night. Now she would usually get up at some point and come into my room and remind us that it was late and she couldn't sleep because we were too loud, but she let me keep having friends over. And she was a good influence on us too. Giving us life lessons when she had the opportunity.
8. She is very strong. Now I am not talking about physically. Not that with a little adrenaline she couldn't lift a car, but I mean emotionally. She is not shaken easily. She doesn't cry at the drop of a hat. When I am overwhelmed I call her and she gives me an action plan. She takes my bunch of tearful emotions and organizes them into something productive.
9. She is a great grandmother. When we found out Aidan was a boy she said " I don't know what to do with a boy". She could have fooled me. Aidan loves her so much. He just about blows up with excitement when he looks through the window on her front door and sees her coming.
10. She is MY mom. I love her most because she is MINE. I am very blessed to have this great example of a women as my mom. She has given me so many wonderful qualities. Especially the gospel. Only one other person in the whole world is as blessed as I am in this regard and I think she would agree with me one hundred percent that she is the best mom a girl could have.
I LOVE YOU MOM.
Tuesday, May 6, 2008
I have 5 can openers?!?!?!?!?!
Whatever government agency is incharge of resource allocation is not doing their job. Let me show you what I mean with some before and after pictures.
before
after
before
after
before
after
Today I attacked the kitchen. In my efforts to organize the mess I found that I had 5 can openers. One old fashion. (Have to keep that because my great grandfather invented it.) One electric. One in my camping stuff and two manual can openers in the house. I ask why do I have or need 5. Two maybe. I can even rationalize 3 but 5!!! I have found that I have enough plastic silverware to last for at least three meals a day for a month or more. I have more stupid cups than I can count. I even have a wine bottle opener thing. I am Mormon. Never had wine don't plan on having wine. Is there some other use for this tool? Can it be used to make a craft or possibly in gardening? If there is I don't it. So why do I have it? Tupperware, Rubbermaid? Oh I have plenty of that too. Now I don't know that I have lids to go with the containers or vise versa, but I have plenty. Frying pans =8. I have two that are exactly alike even. I only have four burners on my stove. I can't even use them all at the same time. I suppose I could have some kind of omlet party and just go wild. But lets face it, I would burn more than I would serve.
On the other hand I have only one small cutting board. So my guess is somewhere someone has 10 different sized cutting boards and the government has not auditted their posessions yet either. Maybe I should send some of my things to a developing country. Maybe they could use one of my cake servers. Do they have much cake in developing countries? Honestly I just use a knife, fork, spatula, or my fingers.
Tomorrow, I move onto the bedrooms. Again, I wear basically the same things over and over again, but I have enough clothes to go months and never wear the same outfit. I understand that a formal dress doesn't work at Chili's but you get the idea. Plus there are the clothes that I really intend to get back into. Today, I put one of those on and let's just say sausages have nothing on me. But don't worry. I will be a size two by the end of the year. Which will then mean I have to save all of these clothes for when I gain the weight back or to show on the weightloss commercials. I mean how many times has that Jared guy from Subway shown his old jeans. So I will have clothes from size two on up right? I should just try and get to a 12 and save some closet space.
Well, I should head to bed. I will talk to Matt in the morning about what government agency is in charge of auditting my possessions. I am thinking it is the IRS. In which case, he should have some pull.
Andrea
Saturday, May 3, 2008
Not so over the rainbow
Okay I made it here alive. Most of my stuff made it here alive. (the cat and the orange tree are doing well by the way) I am so completely overwhelmed or frustrated or something that I am having a hard time. Have I mentioned I do not adjust well to change? My house is one big mess. All of my stuff is who knows where. I feel so unorganized that I may have an OCD attack. Right now Matt is out making nice with the guys who helped us unpack. But I need to vent right now. I need to say that somewhere deep inside me behind all of my fear there is part of me saying that this will work out fine. I know I am now more able to do what I have wanted to do than ever before. I can stay home and care for Aidan, maybe have another baby, volunteer somewhere, hang out with other moms. The only problem with this is that I wanted to do it all in Michigan. I so looked forward to the day that I could go back to mother's group. I wanted to hang out at the Walker Library with Aidan and read the same books I had read as a kid ( well, new ones too, but really some of my old favorites are still there). I wanted to spend my summers at the beach and my winters sleading down the sugar bowl. I wanted to take Aidan to some of those places you go on field trips as a kid, but for some reason rarely go as an adult such as: the PJ Hoffmaster nature center, the county museum, the dairy(on free ice cream day). Now I have to find all new things to do. Which can be exciting or with the wrong attitude can be a burden. Is that what it really comes down to? Attitude? Like that quote goes, 90% is attitude.
Wow blogging really works! It is just like a journal only better. I get everything out and then I somehow figure it out. Okay I am going to put on my happy face and head out to clean some of this mess up.
By the way, my sister-in-law dropped by with an invitation to her wedding. Now as you know my husband and sister-in-law are not really associating with one another at this time. So I don't believe we are going to go to said wedding. Our question is: if you get an invitation are you required to get them a gift, despite the realtionship at this time? Let me know.
Well on the good side we upgraded due to our move to a DVR. An invention I am told I will not be able to live without once I try it.
PS has anyone ever heard of the Magic Jack? It is a phone thing. We ordered it and are hoping it is as good as it seems.
Andrea
Wow blogging really works! It is just like a journal only better. I get everything out and then I somehow figure it out. Okay I am going to put on my happy face and head out to clean some of this mess up.
By the way, my sister-in-law dropped by with an invitation to her wedding. Now as you know my husband and sister-in-law are not really associating with one another at this time. So I don't believe we are going to go to said wedding. Our question is: if you get an invitation are you required to get them a gift, despite the realtionship at this time? Let me know.
Well on the good side we upgraded due to our move to a DVR. An invention I am told I will not be able to live without once I try it.
PS has anyone ever heard of the Magic Jack? It is a phone thing. We ordered it and are hoping it is as good as it seems.
Andrea
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